how do you remove this
 

It the thing under the red suede. the part were you rest your arm.

Pull the door panel and grind off the glued tabs. To reinstall, use plastic weld.

ok thanks. and how do you remove the lid of the center armrest?

I've never gotten one off without it seeming to be ready to break. If you're thinking of suede, don't. Over time it gets worn down to a greasy-plastic look.

alright last question how do i remove the rear deck?

ECS has the center console lid in black leatherette for $190 new.

Audi B5 A4 Quattro 1.8T > Interior > Arm Rest > ES#431393 Armrest Upper Lid - Onyx Black Leather - 8D0864245AEGXA

No idea on how to remove it.

to remove the back deck you have to pop off the plastic covers off the lil hooks on the top of the deck... than un bolt them... there are clips that click out jus be careful not to break them... an it slides out towards the front of the car