AudiForums.com - DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

>> >DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS
>> >
>> > 40-ish - 49
>> >
>> > Adventurous - Slept with everyone
>> >
>> > Athletic - No tits
>> >
>> > Average looking - Ugly
>> >
>> > Beautiful - Pathological liar
>> >
>> > Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
>> >
>> > Emotionally secure - On medication
>> >
>> > Feminist - Fat
>> >
>> > Free spirit - Junkie
>> >
>> > Friendship first - Former very *friendly*
>> >person
>> >
>> > Fun - Annoying
>> >
>> > New Age - Body hair in the wrong
>> >places
>> >
>> > Open-minded - Desperate
>> >
>> > Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
>> >
>> > Passionate - Sloppy drunk
>> >
>> > Professional - Bitch
>> >
>> > Voluptuous - Very Fat
>> >
>> > Large frame - Hugely Fat
>> >
>> > Wants Soul mate - Stalker
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> >WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
>> >
>> > 1. Yes = No
>> >
>> > 2. No = Yes
>> >
>> > 3. Maybe = No
>> >
>> > 4. We need = I want
>> >
>> > 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
>> >
>> > 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
>> >
>> > 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
>> >
>> > 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
>> >
>> > 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you
>> >moron!
>> >
>> > 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever
>> >think
>> >about?
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> >MEN'S ENGLISH
>> >
>> >
>> > 1. I am hungry = I am hungry
>> >
>> > 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
>> >
>> > 3. I am tired = I am tired
>> >
>> > 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
>> >
>> > 5. I love you = let's have sex now
>> >
>> > 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
>> >
>> > 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with >>you
>> >
>> > 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex >>with
>> >you
>> >
>> > 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have
>> >sex
>> >with you
>> >
>> > 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have
>> >sex
>> >with you
>> >
>> > 11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay
>> >
>> >
>> >And finally.....
>> >
>> >A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces
>> >attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle .
>> >
>> >For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with
>> >rugged, masculine features.
>> >
>> >However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in gasoline
>> >and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a broken baseball
>> >bat shoved up his backside.