Where's Jazz?
Where's Jazz?
So, in honor of our long lost brother who started a game, then hasn't been heard of since, I suggest we start a humerous "Where's Jazz" thread. It's kinda like "Where's Waldo" but with words instead of pictures. Let's try to keep this going with humerous little stories, so if he ever returns, we can get a little laugh at his expense as he tries to explain his actual whereabouts, and disprove the theories listed below...
I'm pretty sure I saw his A8 parked out front of the gay bar down the street from my house while I was on my way home the other night... I'm assuming he picked up a couple young boys with his "stranger candy" and lured them back to his "Pleasure Chamber" full of oversized ****** and KY jelly. Unknown to him at the time, these young boys had a plan, and now he's tied up in his own place, and is repeatedly tag teamed and *** raped with said oversized ******... Poor Jazz, I how you manage to escape soon, and I hope they are at least using the lube you so graciously provided for them...
I'm pretty sure I saw his A8 parked out front of the gay bar down the street from my house while I was on my way home the other night... I'm assuming he picked up a couple young boys with his "stranger candy" and lured them back to his "Pleasure Chamber" full of oversized ****** and KY jelly. Unknown to him at the time, these young boys had a plan, and now he's tied up in his own place, and is repeatedly tag teamed and *** raped with said oversized ******... Poor Jazz, I how you manage to escape soon, and I hope they are at least using the lube you so graciously provided for them...
Administrator
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 11,291
From: Los Angeles, CA
Oh my. Tag teaming little boys. He called me last night, mistaken me for Jeremy (ImTheDevil) and asked if I wanted to join the "team". Of course, he then realized I wasn't Jeremy by my confusion and my zero interest in teenage boys.
Let's start the "Bring back Jazz" campaign (we had something similar like this years ago).
Let's start the "Bring back Jazz" campaign (we had something similar like this years ago).
Last edited by kriptonik; Dec 11, 2010 at 05:57 PM.
Administrator
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 11,291
From: Los Angeles, CA
What would be the worst case scenario?
How about this: He was on a secret mission, saving the world from spam. The US government managed to locate the headquarter of spammers located in Russia. Jazz was contacted and flew out to Russia. As he arrived, he took a cab to a local teenage boys club (similar to YMCA except they are all teenage boys who do nothing but dance to Savage Garden and Spice Girls music). At first, he was hesitant to enter the club as he speaks no word of Russian, but come to think about it, he is Jazz. What's speakin' the language gotta do with it! He opened the door and all the sudden 20 teenage Russian kids stared at him, pointing, while screaming SHAFT!
Jazz was too nice to tell these kids that he isn't the real Shaft. He plays with them, pretends like he cares about them, and at times plays "spank the naughty boy" with them (he often plays the role of the naughty boy).
Meanwhile, the US government and the Audiforums are having a hard time locating him. The planted tracking device within his uniform is no longer active (clothing is optional in the club so of course it's only polite if Jazz honors the locals by taking off his whole outfit, which was stolen by the North Koreans).
Oh well, that's not so bad.
How about this: He was on a secret mission, saving the world from spam. The US government managed to locate the headquarter of spammers located in Russia. Jazz was contacted and flew out to Russia. As he arrived, he took a cab to a local teenage boys club (similar to YMCA except they are all teenage boys who do nothing but dance to Savage Garden and Spice Girls music). At first, he was hesitant to enter the club as he speaks no word of Russian, but come to think about it, he is Jazz. What's speakin' the language gotta do with it! He opened the door and all the sudden 20 teenage Russian kids stared at him, pointing, while screaming SHAFT!
Jazz was too nice to tell these kids that he isn't the real Shaft. He plays with them, pretends like he cares about them, and at times plays "spank the naughty boy" with them (he often plays the role of the naughty boy).
Meanwhile, the US government and the Audiforums are having a hard time locating him. The planted tracking device within his uniform is no longer active (clothing is optional in the club so of course it's only polite if Jazz honors the locals by taking off his whole outfit, which was stolen by the North Koreans).
Oh well, that's not so bad.
Last edited by kriptonik; Dec 11, 2010 at 08:54 PM.
I received a ransom call 3 days ago but I'm broke and can't afford the $5 they asked for. They said they kidnapped jazz once he started a campaign to rid the site of spam. Spam being their only source of income I can see how they were upset. I guess I could of started a fund to raise the $5 but I'm just to busy right now... I think I lost the guys number anyways... Can't I just be the new token black guy anyways?
4th Gear
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 4,203
From: Parts Unknown
See the Free Jazz thread from a few years back.
My guess is that he is in charge of Santa's Naughty list (probably volunteered) and is to administer spankings starting next week. Working out now at the Y to get in shape for those that resist.
My guess is that he is in charge of Santa's Naughty list (probably volunteered) and is to administer spankings starting next week. Working out now at the Y to get in shape for those that resist.
