ORIGINAL: IamSputnik

Now i am going to have one of those uncomfortable talks with my son because he saw that.

Billy: Daddy what was that?

Dad: Well son thats what happens when somebody who doesnt know any better starts to touch themselves to much. They start to go blind so they cant really see what they are doing and how it hurts people.

Billy: Why doesnt he know any better don't his friends tell him its wrong.

Dad: Well son he has no friends and the people he hangs around with can't pay attention for more than 2sec because they listen to too much rap music and smoke to much weed.

Billy: What's weed?

Dad: One conversation at a time billy.

Billy: What does jesus think about what he is doing?

Dad: Jesus is to busy crying after seeing that.

Billy: Is it really that bad daddy?

Dad: Yes son its called RICE and if you ever see anybody with RICE run away and i find a responsible AUDI owner to go stop the bad people from doing RICE. He may have to kill them but we all have to do what we can to stop the spread of RICE.

Billy: Isnt killing bad daddy?

Dad: Yes son but remember that jesus is crying so he cant see that you killed him so its okay.

Dad: Let me put it this way son would you cover yourself in ****?

Billy: No daddy thats gross.

Dad: Exactly covering yourself or your car in **** is wrong so never do it.

Billy: Okay daddy jimmy's dad got a honda civic and we are going to go for a ride in it.Bye.

Dad: F#^$&ing mail mans kid.