>> >DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS
>> >
>> > 40-ish - 49
>> >
>> > Adventurous - Slept with everyone
>> >
>> > Athletic - No ****
>> >
>> > Average looking - Ugly
>> >
>> > Beautiful - Pathological liar
>> >
>> > Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
>> >
>> > Emotionally secure - On medication
>> >
>> > Feminist - Fat
>> >
>> > Free spirit - Junkie
>> >
>> > Friendship first - Former very *friendly*
>> >person
>> >
>> > Fun - Annoying
>> >
>> > New Age - Body hair in the wrong
>> >places
>> >
>> > Open-minded - Desperate
>> >
>> > Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
>> >
>> > Passionate - Sloppy drunk
>> >
>> > Professional - Bitch
>> >
>> > Voluptuous - Very Fat
>> >
>> > Large frame - Hugely Fat
>> >
>> > Wants Soul mate - Stalker
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> >WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
>> >
>> > 1. Yes = No
>> >
>> > 2. No = Yes
>> >
>> > 3. Maybe = No
>> >
>> > 4. We need = I want
>> >
>> > 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
>> >
>> > 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
>> >
>> > 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
>> >
>> > 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
>> >
>> > 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you
>> >moron!
>> >
>> > 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever
>> >think
>> >about?
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> >MEN'S ENGLISH
>> >
>> >
>> > 1. I am hungry = I am hungry
>> >
>> > 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
>> >
>> > 3. I am tired = I am tired
>> >
>> > 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
>> >
>> > 5. I love you = let's have sex now
>> >
>> > 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
>> >
>> > 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with >>you
>> >
>> > 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex >>with
>> >you
>> >
>> > 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have
>> >sex
>> >with you
>> >
>> > 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have
>> >sex
>> >with you
>> >
>> > 11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay
>> >
>> >
>> >And finally.....
>> >
>> >A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces
>> >attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle .
>> >
>> >For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with
>> >rugged, masculine features.
>> >
>> >However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in gasoline
>> >and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a broken baseball
>> >bat shoved up his backside.

[sm=lol.gif]

the truth!

LMFAO! On the nose, brother, on the nose!

lmao that is great!

ah man, signed on today, looked at two posts..both hilarious..lmao

lol thats great

hahaha today is the day of hilarious postage
gotta love it

perfect...

I do what i can..

True stuff