Guys / Gals, I had to respond to this bulletin board posting. It seems that ladies have this unreal expectation of what a relationship should be THIS IS NOT A FAIRY TALE -so let me set you straight!

What do you say fellas was I truthful?

Here is the original BS:

************************************************** ******************************
When she walks away from you mad
[ Follow her ]

When she stare's at your mouth
[ Kiss her ]

When she pushes you or hit's you
[ Grab her and dont let go ]

When she start's cursing at you
[ Kiss her and tell her you love her ]

When she's quiet
[ Ask her whats wrong ]

When she ignore's you
[ Give her your attention ]

When she pull's away
[ Pull her back ]

When you see her at her worst
[ Tell her she's beautiful ]

When you see her start crying
[Just hold her and dont say a word ]

When you see her walking
[ Sneak up and hug her waist from behind ]

When she's scared
[ Protect her ]

When she lay's her head on your shoulder
[ Tilt her head up and kiss her ]

When she steal's your favorite hat
[ Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night]

When she tease's you
[ Tease her back and make her laugh ]

When she doesnt answer for a long time
[ reassure her that everything is okay ]

When she look's at you with doubt
[ Back yourself up ]

When she say's that she love's you
[ she really does more than you could understand ]

When she grab's at your hands
[ Hold her's and play with her fingers ]

When she bump's into you
[ bump into her back and make her laugh ]

When she tell's you a secret
[ keep it safe and untold ]

When she looks at you in your eyes
[ dont look away until she does ]

WHEN SHE MISSES YOU
[ SHES HURTING INSIDE]

When you break her heart
[ the pain never really goes away ]

When she says its over
[ she still wants you to be hers ]

When she repost this bulletin
[ she wants you to read it ]


- Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.

- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go

- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her

- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up

- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

- Tease her and let her tease you back.

- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.

- Give her the world.

- Let her wear your clothes.

- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.

- Let her know she's important.

- Kiss her in the pouring rain.

- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;

"Who's *** am I kicking today baby?"

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you.

Guys post as: "I'd be this Boyfriend."
Girls post as: "A real Boyfriend"

************************************************** ******************************
End of Original BS






In response to " A real man / boyfriend"... the answers are much different if you change the genders -why do guys have to put up with sooo much ****


When he walks away from you mad
[ Leave him alone ]

When he stare's at your mouth
[ Smile]

When he pushes you or hit's you
[ Call the cops ]

When he start's cursing at you
[ Apologise or see last answer ]

When he's quiet
[ Leave him alone ]

When he ignore's you
[ Leave him alone ]

When he pull's away
[ Leave him alone ]

When you see him at his worst
[ Stand by him and see last answer ]

When you see him start crying
[ Leave him alone ]

When you see him walking
[ Don't sneak up and hug his waist from behind ]

When he's scared
[ Stand by him ]

When he lay's his head on your shoulder
[ Go find a taller boyfriend ]

When he steal's your favorite hat
[ Make sure he didn't take your underwear too ]

When he tease's you
[ Tease him back and make him laugh ]

When he doesnt answer for a long time
[ Leave him alone ]

When he look's at you with doubt
[ Doubt him back ]

When he say's that he love's you
[ he probably doesn't but feels pressured, or wants to get laid ]

When he grab's at your hands
[ Hold him -lets face it, its rare if a guy wants to hold hands ]

When he bump's into you
[ let him by -don't expect the "right of way" just because your female -let him give you the right of way ]

When he tell's you a secret
[ Ladies, hes not telling you anything his friends don't already know ]

When he looks at you in your eyes
[ look away and smile ]

WHEN HE MISSES YOU
[ HES LOOKING FOR A SUBSTITUTE POA]

When you break his heart
[ he becomes a stalker ]

When he says its over
[ its been over for a long time and probably has another chick pregnant ]

When he reposts this bulletin
[ he wants you to compare the answers for the genders and understand how much work relationships are to a guy. Ladies are allowed to have all kinds of tantrums and be high maintenace... all we want is a little peace and quiet with a side of sex in return ]

OK for these next ones I couldn't change the genders so you just get my comments...

- Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything. - Do you know how much guys hate this... but we do it

- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go -like that ever works...

- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her -Grow up a little... I'm OK with this sometimes but ladies you have to grow up a little we are your boyfriends NOT your fathers... save this **** for your girlfriends

- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you -as that ******* who did all kinds of bad things, regardless of all the above BS you put up with

- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her -Don't go overboard you ***... just get her something nice and take her out like a normal person

- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up -You must be fukking kidding me... If someone did this to me I would RUN !

- Treat her like she's all that matters to you. -Don't give anyone false hopes, be upfront and let her know where she stands... Make her earn this privelage of being most important to you -otherwise you will get abused

- Tease her and let her tease you back. -OK

- Stay up all night with her when she's sick. -OK

- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid. -Lets face it we do this to stop the whinning... We don't want to watch your **** and you don't want to watch ours. Take turns but don't pretend you like **** you don't like. Otherwise they won't know the effort you are putting in.

- Give her the world. -But only if she gives it in return

- Let her wear your clothes. -But only if she washes them

- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. -This ALWAYS seems to be the case. Sad usually equals bitchy -who wants to deal with that??

- Let her know she's important. -How about let her make herself important.

- Kiss her in the pouring rain. -OK

- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;

"What is your problem... get a grip"

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you. -Who wrote this BULLSHIT -noone will call you so forget it!

 

2 types... ***** and C teases. lol

i know plenty of both.

 

I bet bob12312357 posted this and made fun of it as an excuse to post it because he really does think that the one he loves will call him, kiss him, love him, text him. But he's not going to admit it.

 

is this off a myspace bulletin?

 

Ah, nah, man! you got the Bob all wrong - he's our window into to the galactically stupid posts - y'know - it's like, he's cool and a legend in his own mind and all, but if you see it's a post from the Bob - you can save the energy it would take to read it...

ya gotta love that the Bob is consistent, y'know [8D]

 

He is consistent. That's why I .

 

OH SNAPS.. LMAOLMAOLMAO

 

The Jazz’z take…
************************************************** ******************************
When she walks away from you mad
[ Let her go… If She’ll walk away just because She’s a little mad She’ll walk away when you REALLY need someone to be there for you, too! ][/b]

When she stare's at your mouth
[ Ask if you have something stuck in your teeth, because… yeah, you prolly DO ]
[/b]
When she pushes you or hit's you
[ Push or hit Her BACK… Who da heck does She think She is?!?!? Modern times BABY! EQUAL under the law, RIGHT? You swing, *I* swing BACK! ]
[/b]
When she start's cursing at you
[ Curse that @$$ back, or, walk away MAD… ]
[/b]
When she's quiet
[ Thank your luck stars. And, remember whatever it was you did to bring about this aural respite. Repeat as often as possible! ]
[/b]
When she ignore's you
[ See above ]
[/b]
When she pull's away
[ Let Her GO! Heck, if She wants to stay She’s welcome. If She wants to bounce, She’s WELCOME to that, TOO! ]
[/b]
When you see her at her worst
[ two words: Eye Bleach ]
[/b]
When you see her start crying
[ Try not to laugh as She goes into the long, drawn out reason why She blah-blah-blah… ]

[/b]When you see her walking
[ …from behind hope that She has an onion worth appreciating. If not, let her KEEP walking and go find one WITH an onion worth appreciating ]

[/b]When she's scared
[ Promise not to hit her, again, if She’ll promise to listen, NEXT TIME ]
[/b]
When she lay's her head on your shoulder
[ Send Her your dry-cleaning bill for getting all that krappy makeup removed from one of your best shirts ]
[/b]
When she steal's your favorite hat
[ Ask for it back. If it’s not returned in a reasonable time file a police report and take out a restraining order… She’s OBVIOUSLY psycho ]

[/b]When she tease's you
[ Tease her back and make her cry… That’ll teach Her that teasing isn’t funny, unless you’re a Dude ]
[/b]
When she doesnt answer for a long time
[ Ahhhh… She was starting to get clingy, anyway. You’re better off without the drain on your emotions. ]
[/b]
When she look's at you with doubt
[ Question Her loyalty ]
[/b]
When she say's that she love's you
[ Repeat after me: “Right back athca, babe…” ]
[/b]
When she grab's at your hands
[ Warn Her, ONCE, and only once. Next time… PIMP-SLAP! ]
[/b]
When she bump's into you
[ Grind Her, and if your G/F see you, GRIND HARDER! ]
[/b]
When she tell's you a secret
[ pretend to listen ]
[/b]
When she looks at you in your eyes
[ dont look away until she does [/b]ß[/b]a STARING contest, NOW you’re talking!!! ]
[/b]
WHEN SHE MISSES YOU
[ She’s being clingy, again. Avoid her, for a week, or so. You need to break of of this inappropriate behavior, once and for all ]
[/b]
When you break her heart
[ the pain never really goes away [/b]ß[/b] not MY problem. Obviously She needs to learn some better life skills. ]
[/b]
When she says its over
[ She BETTER be damn SURE, ‘cause, when I walk out the door it’ll be straight across the street to that **** neighbor of Hers that’s been eyeballin’ me for the last few weeks. I’ll bet SHE will appreciate having a Man around. ][/b]

When she repost this bulletin
[ She’s attempting to leverage some emotional blackmail on your weak @$$. BE STRONG! Fall for it now and you may as well cut off your own ********* and hand them to her. Again, you’re only encouraging inappropriate behavior. ]
[/b]

- Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
WRONG! What? I’ve sudden’y got a plan with UNLIMITED minutes? I don’t THINK so!!![/b]
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
WRONG! Unless She’s WILLING to discuss the issue like an adult, instead of a whiny baby, She needs to learn some coping skills. *I* have to adjust to Her mood swings, She can certainly adjust to my mood swings (read: nightly beer-drinking binges), too [/b]

[/b]- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her
WRONG! Believe it. If She’d LEARN to comminucate EFFECTIVELY, instead of this Ninja-like stealth communications krap She’d be better, more often, because people would KNOW when She wasn’t, and be able to address the REAL problem: Her inability to communicate effective without all this Ninja-like stealth[/b] communications.[/b]

[/b]- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
…as the second bottle of sleeping pills kicks in, and She laments how much better off She would have been if only She hadn’t messed up and driven you away with Her silly female relationship games.[/b]

[/b]- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
…Because visiting hours at the psyche-ward don’t start until 4pm[/b]

- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
And use Her home number, so you KNOW She’s not parked outside taking notes on yoru comings and goings![/b]

- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
WRONG! Do this and you wil be WHIPPED FOR LIFE. You may as well cut off your sac and have them bronzed, for Her.[/b]

[/b]- Tease her and let her tease you back.
WRONG! Women don’t know how to take teasing. You will eventually make Her cry, which will take you off the program, if you know what I mean. Teasing = Bad idea![/b]

- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.
As long as it’s HER place. Or, if She agrees to clean YOUR place, as soon as She’s feeling good enough to complain about the level and nature of sick-friend-help you are graciously providing.[/b]

[/b]- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.
REAL Men KNOW this as the QUICKEST way into the panties. DO this as often as necessary to seal the deal… or, twice, whichever is sooner. More than two times and She’s officially HIGH-Maintainance. DUMP HER and move on to easier mountains to conquer. No sense being a FOOL about it, is there?[/b]

- Give her the world.
If by “World” you mean the opportunity to incubate my offspring, iount know, let’s wait and see if She’s “Mommy-material” first, with LOTS of practice sessions![/b]

[/b]- Let her wear your clothes.
…well, the bottoms, but ONLY when She ABSOUTELY MUST come out of the kitchen or bedroom. Otherwise…[/b]

[/b]- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.
WRONG! Why harsh MY high, just because She apparently doesn’t know how to stop and pick up a 6-pack on the way home from that worthless job She puts up with?[/b]

- Let her know she's important.
And I WILL, as SOON as She brings me another Beer![/b]

[/b]- Kiss her in the pouring rain.
Heck, I’ll kiss Her in the Poutang, as long as She puts out, twice each night and once each morning[/b]

[/b]- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"NOW WHAT!?!?!?"

[/b]If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you. – and annoy you with whatever Her problems were with that co-worker She can’t figure out how to get along with.
[/b]Kiss you. – my @$$ is what she BETTER be kissing, for going along with this pansy-@$$’d schitt[/b]
Love you. – I spell this: B – L – O – W – J – O - B
[/b]Text you. – Good. Then I won’t hafta TALK to Her until later on, AFTER I’ve had a few beers.[/b]

 

If you don't forward this to 100 people in the next 10 minutes, the nosecone to a Boeing 777 will fall off and kill you and your family, and your dog will **** on the mayor.

 

you are officially the coolest guy in my book LMFAO I LOVE THAT!!!! as horrible as it is i love it loll
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